Who’s worse, the NHL or Matt Cooke?

So Gary Bettman, this is throwing the book at a repeat offender? This is how you punish a guy who just last month was suspended for four games? Your league is in the news for entirely the wrong reasons Gary and it’s happening on your watch. Poor attendance in at least six markets, ownership issues in St. Louis, Dallas, Toronto and yes, for the love of God, PHOENIX!!! (Move them to Winnipeg with your tail between your legs and suck it up already) Now the chance comes along to finally address the number one issue surrounding the NHL today, headshots. Matt Cooke is a parasite. He’s a coward and he’s the dirtiest player in the game. He’s a repeat offender who just doesn’t get it. Blatant head shots to a laundry list of fellow players, Marc Savard immediately comes to mind. Answer this question Gary, how many more careers will Matt Cooke directly affect?

Play to the whistle, that’s what the coach always says. We as hockey fans always respect players who give 110% to the cause, a guy that’ll stand up for his teammates, a guy who will walk that line, but not cross it. Matt Cooke is NOT that guy. Jeesus, you thought Sean Avery making some stupid remarks about an ex made the league look bad? How about a guy who goes around headhunting, ending his fellow players careers? You had a chance to send a message to a guy who just doesn’t get it anymore. Suspension for the rest of the season and the first round of the playoffs? This guy shouldn’t be allowed to lace up a pair of skates ever again. You dropped the ball Gary, you dropped the ball.

Thoughts on a few things, Charlie Sheen & NHL draft day

What an interesting couple of days in the world of televised folly. First up, Charlie Sheen doing some “damage control”. His former publicist didn’t think it was such a great idea, so he quit. A few hours later, Charlie fired him. Not sure if Charlie remembers how that sorta thing tends to work. You either quit, or you’re fired. Never the two shall meet. Then again, if he didn’t follow through on his damage control tour, 2011, we wouldn’t have learned awesome new saying like, “I’m tired of pretending that I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.”

Or, how one of Charlie’s dates ended with his being attacked by a woman with a cocktail fork. Just like in Seinfeld!

I’m starting to believe that Charlie Sheen could be Superman. ‘Cause he sure as hell ain’t from planet Earth right now.

And another thing….

Thank you to the NHL for boring the living shit out of me yesterday. It was the NHL trade deadline day yesterday, which outside of draft day, is my favorite of all the specialty sports days, right after Christmas. I look forward to it every year, get home, get the chips, the dip, the ice cold bevvies, some adult ones, but only after 11am. I don’t people thinking that I have a problem (See Charlie Sheen post above). I’m a big TSN coverage guy. Mostly because I tuned into Sportsnet and I saw Denis Potvin on their panel. Denis Potvin is an arse. I hate that they replaced Garry Galley on the Sens broadcasts with this guy. Last game, he couldn’t tell the difference between the colours black and blue and kept referring to the Sens as the Panthers. Which would be ok I guess, if the Panthers weren’t the team the Sens were playing against that night, but I digress. You want the real reason why I don’t like him? Denis Potvin snubbed me when I asked to take a picture with him at an Ottawa Renegades game.  F**k Denis Potvin. So I stick with TSN and while the trades weren’t there, the magic of Jay Onrait was. Best thing about TSN’s trade day coverage? Onrait’s crotch shot. Look it up. I think Bell was afraid of loading up that clip. The streets of Toronto would be flooded. Safety first Bell. Anyhoo, I’ll admit it, I have a man crush on Jay Onrait. Dude can rock some Bon Jovi:

C’mon Montreal, you’re classier than this…

I grew up as a fan of les Glorieux in my hometown of Aylmer, Quebec. To be honest, I didn’t know a single person who cheered for anybody else. I refuse to acknowledge certain members of my family who may or may not cheer for a random group of clowns called the Maple Leafs:

I’ll admit it, being a Habs fan was in my blood, my Grand Uncle, Leo “Le Gazelle” Gravelle played for Montreal back in the late 1940′s. So suck on it. I was at the Montreal Forum for Guy Lafleur’s final game in the NHL, I remember my Mom got me his autograph on the back of her pack of Rothmans while the Flower made an appearance at Les Galleries D’Aylmer. The joint was packed! I remember bawling my eyes out the first time the Nordiques eliminated the Canadiens in the playoffs:

I know that wasn’t the clip of the Nordiques knocking out the Habs, but to hell with it. While I hope they get another team in Quebec City, the Habs fan in me still thinks they suck.

But c’mon Montreal, you’re better than this:

Think this image is good for the NHL? Idiots. Not the true fans, but the parasites who thought the best way to celebrate was to smash a window on St. Catherine and grab as much shit as they could find. What the hell were the cops doing? Did they not think that this could happen? Did they just move to the city? Did they forget this?

Too bad, cause they’re on a hell of a run. Go Sens Go however and stay classy.